Kansas City, opinion, cocktails, snark.

March 13, 2008

A Kansas City PSA: Avoid Original Juan Bloody Mary Mix.

Filed under: booze, kansas city, Local Shopping — Tags: , , — akcb @ 4:09 am


I had been really looking forward to trying this ever since I read about it in some Pitch ‘Best of’ issue a year or two back. I finally made it down to the Original Juan factory store on the Boulevard last week and picked up a bottle. My friend C. (of bum shit fame) and I decided to give it a whirl this evening while we watched a couple of episodes of “The Whitest Kids U Know.” We’re both huge fans of Zing Zang, but thought supporting a local product would be kinda nice. Lesson leard. While pain may be good, Originial Juan Blood Mary mix is unspeakably vile.

First of all, it’s thick. Too thick. It sat atop the vodka like a large red dump. Even a thorough stirring failed to integrate it fully. The mouth-feel was heavy & chewy and generally unpleasant. I could have overlooked these characteristics if it weren’t for the taste. The primary flavor is, of course, tomato, but there is a very heavy beef bouillon note, and it ain’t good. It’s a canned beef stock flavor, tinny & sharp. The spice was nice, but I couldn’t get past the tinny artificial meat flavors. We finished our bloody mary’s and fixed a couple of Herbsaint & Cokes to take the taste out of our mouths. I’ll be pouring the rest down the drain and running back to Zing Zang.

I also purchased bottle of hot sauce on my visit and have the highest of hopes. I highly recommend visiting the factory store as it’s a very cool place. They have samples of all their products (and I suggest you take advantage of it; I didn’t and that’s $3.50 I won’t see again soon).


  1. ugh. chewy mouth-feel? you’re killing me here.

    Comment by DLC — March 13, 2008 @ 2:01 pm

  2. I lawl’d.

    Well done.

    Comment by Maureen — April 2, 2008 @ 10:36 pm

  3. Are you kidding me. What I found interesting was that Original Juan had the consistency of……..tomatoe juice.
    It was not the consistency of the horrible tomatoe water mixes found in most bars, grocery
    stores and liquor stores….like Zing Zang. Try making the drink, stir then add ice. Or use a shaker
    and pour it over ice. If you don’t like the flavor, try making your own with tomatoe juice or, no, wait,
    tomatoes. But please, please don’t say you are going to hurry back to Zing Zang. That’s like someone
    not liking a good IPA and saying they are going to run back to a Bud Light because, God Forbid, they
    tasted something like hops.

    Comment by Whompdaddy — December 28, 2010 @ 10:54 pm

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